Guides and tips
My child is asking for a pet, what should I do?
Many children, at some point in their lives, ask their parents to get a pet. This desire may come from their love for animals, their need for companionship or simply from a spontaneous impulse. Before saying yes though, we need to seriously consider what it means to bring an animal into the daily life of the family. This decision does not only concern the child but everyone who will live with the animal and share the responsibility of its care.
In this article, you will see what you need to take into account, how to properly prepare your child and your home, and what alternatives there are if you are not yet ready for such a step.
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Are pets suitable gifts for children?
Adopting with responsibility
The idea of a puppy or kitten wrapped in a ribbon under the Christmas tree might seem adorable, but pets are not objects, they are living beings with needs, emotions and care requirements. When we give a pet as a gift, we often forget that the responsibility for its care does not end the moment we receive it. On the contrary, its care requires daily commitment and attention which lasts for many years.
Children may be excited about the idea of a new friend, but they are not always able to take full responsibility for an animal’s care. A sudden change in their daily routine, such as having to feed or walk the pet, may not be as easy as it seems at first. The realization of this responsibility often comes after the excitement of the initial period, and in some cases, animals may end up neglected either because they did not receive proper care or because the family was not prepared for their needs.
If your child is asking for a pet, do not treat it as a simple gift. Talk it through as a family and discuss the responsibilities that come with caring for an animal.
Visit shelters or foster homes with your child so that they can understand the importance of responsible decision-making and preparation before taking the big step.
Moreover, the decision to adopt a pet must be a conscious one that involves the whole family. Buying or adopting an animal should not happen impulsively and should not be seen as a temporary source of entertainment for a few days. Adults must be ready to take on the responsibility and the decision must be made with care and a full understanding of the animal’s needs.
The truth is that many animals given as “gifts” end up being returned to shelters or abandoned because people are often not ready for what comes next. The first few weeks with a new pet can be full of excitement and joy, but the responsibility and obligations continue for a long time.
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Choosing the right animal for the family
Adopting with responsibility
If you decide to adopt a pet, the first step is to consider what type of animal might suit your family’s lifestyle. Not all animals have the same needs in terms of care, time, space and interaction.
Here is a basic comparison:
Dogs: They need daily exercise, walks, training and constant human interaction. They are not suitable for families who are away from home for many hours or who do not have a stable routine. On the other hand, they can form deep emotional bonds with children and help them develop empathy and responsibility. See more about dogs, here.
Cats: They are more independent and usually do not require constant attention. However, they do need cleanliness, playtime and attention to their behavior, especially if there are young children. The companionship of a cat can be valuable, but on its own terms. See more about cats, here.
Small rodents (hamsters, guinea pigs, rabbits): They may seem ideal for children due to their size, but they often need more care than one might expect. Many of them do not enjoy intense petting and get stressed easily by loud noises or sudden movements. See more about rabbits, here.
Fish or turtles: They do not require physical interaction but they need consistent care to keep their environment clean and healthy. They are suitable for quieter families but do not offer the kind of companionship a child might be looking for.
The choice of pet should be based not only on what the child likes but also on what the family can realistically support in practical, emotional and financial terms. If you have doubts, the advice of a veterinarian or a trainer can help you make a more informed decision.
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Preparing the home and the family
Adopting with responsibility
The decision to bring an animal into your home comes with the need for both practical and emotional preparation, for adults as well as children. A well-organized start can significantly reduce stress and increase the chances of a successful cohabitation.
What to organize before adoption:
Essential supplies you’ll need from day one
Each animal has different needs, but there are some basic items you should have ready before adoption:
Appropriate food, for the animal’s age and species.
Food and water bowls, stable and easy to clean.
A sleeping area or nest, in a quiet and safe spot.
Toys, suitable for its age and activity level.
Cleaning supplies, litter for cats, waste bags for dogs, towels, etc.
Transport equipment, a carrier or harness, if needed
Creating a safe space
Animals, especially during the first few days, need stability and calm.
Make sure to:
Limit access to potentially dangerous areas (kitchen, balconies, stairs).
Remove plants that are toxic to animals (such as lilies, aloe, dracaena).
Ensure there are no small objects or wires on the floor that could be swallowed or cause injury.
Talking to your child before adoption
Before the animal arrives, open and honest conversation is needed:
Explain that the animal will have daily needs, not just when the child “feels like it”.
Emphasize companionship and care, not control or ownership.
You can use storybooks, discussions, or even visit a shelter together to explore what responsible adoption really means.
Assigning roles and responsibilities
One of the most common issues that arises after the initial excitement fades is the distribution of responsibilities.
It’s important to agree from the start:
Who feeds the animal and how often.
Who handles cleaning or litter changes.
Who takes the animal for walks or to the vet.
While a child can certainly help, responsibility must always remain with the adults. The care of an animal cannot rely solely on the willingness or mood of a minor.
The decision to bring an animal into your home comes with the need for both practical and emotional preparation, for adults as well as children. A well-organized start can significantly reduce stress and increase the chances of a successful cohabitation.
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Understanding the animal’s needs and personality
Adopting with responsibility
Before adopting an animal, it's important to have a basic understanding of what to expect in terms of behavior, energy level, and needs, not just based on the species or breed, but mainly according to its age, background, and environment. An animal is not a toy. It is a living being with a unique personality, and living together requires respect and attentiveness.
Not all animals are “good with children”
There is a common myth that all dogs or cats “love children.”
In reality:
An animal may feel stressed or afraid due to sudden movements, loud voices, or intense physical contact.
Children, especially under the age of 6, often struggle to recognize an animal’s boundaries and may unintentionally cause stress or even injury.
Animals that have been abused or raised in poor environments may be particularly wary or irritable.
This is why it's so important to choose an animal whose behavior has already been assessed by professionals, especially if you have young children.
Differences based on age
Key differences:
Puppies and kittens are full of energy and often behave unpredictably. They may bite, scratch, or run around uncontrollably. They need training, time, and patience.
Adult animals are usually calmer and more predictable. They are often a better fit for families looking for a more stable daily routine.
Senior animals may have health issues or reduced energy, but are often extremely gentle and affectionate.
Ask about the animal’s routine and needs
Before adopting, make sure to find out:
How active the animal is on a daily basis.
Whether it gets along with other dogs, cats, or children.
Whether it has any fears, fixed habits, or health problems.
What its dietary and veterinary needs are.
The more you know, the better you’ll be able to prepare and integrate the animal into your family with calm and safety.
If you're considering adopting a dog or cat, try visiting a shelter first with your child. Observe how they interact with different animals and talk afterward about how it felt. It's a safe and educational experience that helps foster understanding of responsibility and respect for animals, before you make a final decision.
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What children need to learn
Attention
Getting a pet is a wonderful opportunity for a child to learn important values, but this doesn’t happen automatically. It’s the parent's role to guide the child, explaining that a pet is not a toy but a living being with needs and emotions.
Depending on their age, children can actively take part in the animal’s care, always under supervision. It's important they learn how to approach the animal calmly, respect its personal space, and recognize signs of discomfort or fear. Kindness, consistency, and gentleness are skills that are cultivated through daily contact.
Additionally, it helps to explain that time, consistency, and patience are part of the responsibility. The idea that a pet doesn’t “obey” on its own but needs guidance and love lays a solid foundation for empathy and maturity.
You can give your child small and consistent responsibilities (like providing fresh water or brushing the pet), so they feel useful and responsible.
Positive reinforcement (praise, treats, affection) works equally well for both animals and children. Shared routines, such as feeding time or walks, are ideal moments for the child to practice simple commands with consistency and love.
The importance of training
Life with a pet becomes harmonious when there is mutual understanding and clear boundaries, something that is achieved through training. Many people think of training as something that only concerns the animal, but in reality, it’s a process that also involves the child. They learn together.
A pet, especially a young one, needs consistency and positive guidance to understand what is allowed and what isn’t. Similarly, the child needs to understand how to behave around the animal in a way that strengthens their bond and avoids confusion or fear. Training brings stability, reinforces a sense of safety, and deepens their connection.
Involving children in training (with simple, everyday commands or routines) helps them develop self-discipline and respect. Through this process, they learn how to reinforce positive behaviors, manage frustration, and remain calm when things don’t go as expected.
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Emotional preparation and realistic expectations
Adopting with responsibility
Emotional preparation is often overlooked when a family decides to adopt a pet. Many start out excited but without a full understanding of the responsibilities and potential difficulties that may arise along the way. Honest, open conversations with your child are essential to help build a lasting, meaningful relationship rather than a short adventure that ends in disappointment.
A pet is not always happy, willing, or healthy. It might make a mess, destroy items, get sick, or grow old. A child needs to learn that these are natural parts of life and don’t mean failure or the end of love. Explain that every animal, just like every person, has good days and difficult ones and will always need care and acceptance.
Talk to your child in simple terms about the life cycle of an animal, not to frighten them, but to give them space to ask questions and understand.
If the animal gets sick or grows old, ask for the child’s help with small acts of care. This involvement strengthens empathy and the bond they share.
It’s important to talk in advance about the effects of time, how the animal grows and changes, the possibility of illness, and even death. As hard as it may seem, giving a child the opportunity to accompany an animal through its later years is a valuable lesson in unconditional love, care without expectations, and facing loss with tenderness.
Loving a pet is a wonderful starting point, but it’s not enough on its own. It takes consistency, commitment, and maturity, things a child cannot develop without support. Your presence, as an example and a guide, is the key.
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What to do if you're not ready for a pet
Adopting with responsibility
The responsibility of saying no
The desire to adopt an animal can arise suddenly, especially when a child expresses it with enthusiasm. However, it’s important not to get carried away by the emotion of the moment.
Recognizing that your family is not yet ready for a pet doesn’t mean you’re depriving your child of something, it means you value the life and needs of the animal. Such a decision requires maturity and long-term planning, not impulsiveness.
Opportunities to connect without full responsibility
Fortunately, there are ways to give your child meaningful experiences with animals without taking on the daily responsibilities that come with pet guardianship.
Getting involved with animal welfare groups, volunteering at shelters, or visiting farms and animal parks can offer children the chance to learn about care, sensitivity, and species diversity through hands-on experience.
This kind of contact can also serve as a “test” to see whether they’re truly ready to live with an animal at home.
Look for animal-related activities in your area, many offer educational programs for children to get to know animals. Talk with your child about the alternatives. You may be surprised at how willing they are to participate with empathy, even without immediately bringing an animal home.
The experience of temporary fostering
For families seeking a more direct experience, but not a permanent one, temporary fostering can be an excellent option. Many shelters look for foster homes until permanent adoption is possible.
This type of care gives your child daily experiences of living with an animal, but without a long-term commitment. It’s also a great opportunity for the whole family to engage in a socially responsible act together.
Give your child a small “care project”, like looking after a potted plant or visiting an animal at the shelter every week. These can gradually nurture consistency and responsibility.
Long-distance sponsorship
Another low-commitment alternative is “long-distance sponsorship”. Organizations offer the option to financially support an animal living in a shelter or protected environment, learning about its story and following its progress.
This builds children's empathy and teaches them that helping doesn’t always require physical presence, but can take many different forms.
Laying the groundwork for a responsible decision
All these alternatives don’t cancel the possibility of adoption in the future, on the contrary, they help prepare for it in the right way. They give your child experiences, images, and emotions that support emotional growth, and give you the time you need to determine if and when you’ll be able to welcome a pet into your life responsibly.
Don’t see it as a rejection, but as a step toward preparation for a future where saying “yes” will truly mean commitment and care.
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When the child loses interest
Adopting with responsibility
The natural fading of excitement
It is perfectly normal for a child’s initial excitement about a pet to fade over time. The routine care, the repetition of responsibilities and the realization that a pet is a living being with its own needs, not a toy, can lead to emotional distancing. This is not a failure but an opportunity for constructive dialogue and guidance.
The family's role in maintaining the bond
Living with a pet is a family matter. Even if the child was the one who initially asked for the animal, the care cannot rely solely on their age or mood. When interest fades, it is important for the adults to show understanding and remain consistently present. Involving the whole family in the pet’s daily life helps the child reconnect with the bond they once felt and gradually re-engage in the process.
Reconnecting the relationship
Instead of pressuring the child, offer creative ways to renew their interest, such as new activities with the pet, educational videos or books about the animal, or even joining a visit to the vet. The child needs reminders not only of their responsibilities but also of the joy that comes from spending time with a companion animal.
When support is needed
In some cases, the child’s withdrawal from the pet may reflect a broader issue such as anxiety, fatigue or emotional distancing. If you notice ongoing disinterest or changes in the child’s behavior, it is worth exploring the cause more deeply. Support from a child psychologist can help you better understand the child’s attitude and protect their relationship with the animal without pressure or guilt.
Assign small, specific responsibilities again (such as refilling water or food) to help the child reconnect gradually. Create shared moments (such as photos, videos or a care diary) that remind the child of their unique bond with the pet.
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Benefits of living with an animal
Adopting with responsibility
Empathy and understanding of others
Daily contact with an animal helps children better understand the emotions and needs of others. They learn to notice nonverbal cues, recognize when the animal needs care or space, and respond with kindness and respect.
This process strengthens empathy, a skill that children carry into their human relationships as well.
Recognize and verbally praise the care your child shows toward the animal, as this reinforces positive behavior. Create opportunities for shared activities between child and pet, such as play, walks or training, to strengthen their bond.
Responsibility and consistency
A pet requires daily care, whether it is feeding, cleaning or simply companionship. When children actively participate in these tasks, they begin to understand the importance of consistency and planning.
Even simple chores teach children that there are responsibilities that cannot be ignored or postponed.
Building self-esteem
When a child manages to care for their pet properly or successfully train it to follow a basic command, they feel proud and capable.
The animal’s emotional response, its devotion and trust, reinforce the child’s sense of worth and satisfaction in the relationship.
Companionship and emotional support
A pet can become a vital source of stability and emotional support, especially during difficult times such as changes at school, family tensions or moments of loneliness.
Pets do not judge, do not get angry and offer affection and presence generously.
Connection with the natural world
Caring for an animal reconnects children with nature, even when they live in an urban environment. Through play, walks or simple observation, the child becomes more attuned to the natural needs, rhythms and biology of another living being.
This contact cultivates respect for life and the environment.
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Useful resources and support
Adopting with responsibility
Information before adoption
efore you decide to welcome a pet into your family, it is important to get informed from reliable sources. Veterinarians, animal welfare organizations, specialized websites and animal trainers can offer you a realistic understanding of the needs of each type of pet and what to expect from living with one.
Lifelong learning
Responsible care does not end with adoption. There are excellent books, seminars, online courses and communities aimed at parents and children that can help you overcome challenges or deepen your relationship with your pet. Pet training, health and psychology are constantly evolving fields, and it is worth staying informed.
Support at every stage
f you face challenges, whether in daily life or in unexpected situations, do not hesitate to seek help. This might include professionals such as veterinarians, trainers or behaviorists, as well as foster care organizations or online support groups. No one is born ready to be the perfect guardian. Seeking help is a sign of responsibility.
Start by visiting the website or social media of a local animal welfare organization. There, you will often find advice and opportunities for responsible adoptions. If you are unsure whether a specific animal is suitable for your family, try fostering first. It is a safe way to test the waters before making a permanent commitment.
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Conclusion
The decision for a child to have a pet is not simply a response to a passing wish. It is a meaningful life choice that affects the entire family. It can bring joy, bonding and valuable lessons, as long as it is accompanied by responsibility, consistency and preparation.
A pet is not a toy. It is a living being with needs, emotions and expectations from us. When we give it the space, time and care it deserves, it becomes more than just a “good companion for the child”. It becomes a family member who helps everyone, young and old, to cultivate empathy, patience and unconditional love.
So if you find yourself at this crossroads, take time to think, get informed and have open conversations. There is no single right answer for everyone. But there is a right attitude, seeing animals as equal life companions and not as objects we “offer” to children.
